I've made a mess of me

this is so messed up.. didn't sleep well last night at all.. not sure why.. felt I was being hunted the whole night.. then i had this crazy dream about me running away from faith and finding the true God. From little that I can remember, I think it was something like my whole life was so messed up that I stop believing until God showed up and got my faith back. I think before, I woke up, there was a sigh of relief that my God is the true God.

I wonder if sub-consciously, I'm just like that, waiting to be rescued.